


"It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year" Or So The Song Goes...

by MidnightMarev



Series: Sanders Sides One-Shots [6]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Bad Parenting, Brotherly Analogical - Freeform, Christmas Angst, Comfort in the end, Don't worry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry Patton, Insecurity, Low Self-Esteem, Parental Remile, Physical abuse - mentioned, Platonic Moxiety, Running away from home, Self-Blame, Self-Hatred, Starvation, Verbal abuse - mentioned, being kicked out - mentioned, being sent to bed/your room without dinner, bit of swearing, i think, if you squint you can see signs of touch-starvation, parental manipulation, parents fighting, self-deprecating thoughts, self-deprecation, they're Virgil's parents, vent fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-26 02:27:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,026
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21955864
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MidnightMarev/pseuds/MidnightMarev
Summary: Christmas is supposed to be a time for celebration and joy, yet Patton has experienced none of that. Ever.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders, Dr. Emile Picani/Sleep | Remy Sanders
Series: Sanders Sides One-Shots [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1562938
Comments: 2
Kudos: 76





	"It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year" Or So The Song Goes...

**Author's Note:**

> This is a vent fic. Most of the experiences Patton has had with his parents in this are my own. I may have exaggerated their fighting and the expectations (they could never make me be someone I'm not), but otherwise, it's all me. I'm so sorry, Patton.
> 
> Please tell me if I need to tag anything else! Many different things can be triggering for people, and I may also have missed something. 
> 
> Stay safe my lovelies!! And know that I love you all!! And Merry Christmas!! And happy whatever-you-celebrate since I know Christmas isn't celebrated by many!!

“Patton is the most cheery guy you’ll ever meet.” That's how everyone would describe him. Whether you’ve known him for years or just met him. That’s who Patton wants to be. The most cheery person. Someone you can trust. Someone always in a good mood, always willing to listen and help. Because that’s who his parents want him to be. The one they can show off. “Oh look, here’s our little ray of sunshine!”

But truth be told, Patton was not. His smile was rarely real. He was expected to be the one to stay positive in every situation. And that wasn’t easy when all your family did was fight and yell and take their problems out on you.

Underneath his smile and façade, was a tired 18-year-old boy. Someone who dreaded Christmas. Someone who could barely hold in his tears in front of his parents and friends. Someone who closed himself off from everyone and everything when his bad emotions became too much. Someone who right now stood in the middle of a fight between his parents.

Patton didn’t process what was being said. He just knew it was going to be turned towards him sooner or later and become his fault. It always turned out that way. If only they weren’t paying for his college degree, then he’d run away and live with his best friend, Virgil. That didn’t actually sound like such a bad idea right about now.

Christmas was a very stressful time for Patton. It always had been. Sure, it was stressful for him almost every single day, but Christmas was even worse. His family didn’t have much money, so they had to make do with what little they had. And that affected the mood of everyone living in his household. Himself included, even though he wasn’t allowed to show it. The one time he had, his parents made him regret it. That’s when he learned that they only wanted a sunshine child who was only to be seen, not heard.

As predicted, his parents’ argument ended with Patton getting the blame once again and being sent to his room without dinner. He didn’t even know what it was about. As soon as he closed the door to his room, he reached for his phone. This was getting too much for Patton to handle. He needed out for good this time. And there was only one person he could trust. Virgil. They’d been best friends since high school.

Virgil had told him time and again to get out of there. It was too toxic an environment for Patton to live in. And he was right. But his parents had needed him. He owed it to his parents to help them out. Even after the times, his mother had kicked him out of the house for the rest of the day on freezing cold days in almost no clothes, because he forgot to do a chore before they came home. He got bruises from it too.

Patton held his phone closed to him. He really wanted to call Virgil. Really wanted Virgil to come and get him. Wanted to run away with Virgil and never return to this hell-hole. Patton unlocked his phone but looked passed it. His eyes fell on Virgil’s present. He’d worked hard on it. Worked hard to get the needed parts to make it. He could make this his excuse for calling Virgil? Yeah, and tell him to meet at the park.

His hands were shaking as he scrolled through his contacts and found the one he knew by heart. He hesitated, though. What if Virgil didn’t want to meet up with him? What if he told Patton to just get on with telling his parents off? What if? What if? Wait. Wasn’t Patton always the one helping Virgil when his thoughts spiralled? And what was it Logan had called it again? Cognitive distortions? Virgil was lucky to have a brother like that. A brother who could, and would without a second thought, help you no matter what. Patton was ashamed to admit that he was a bit jealous of Virgil in that aspect. But you make do with what you have. And what Patton had, was two parents who hated each other and himself.

He shook his head. He needed to call Virgil. And call Virgil he did. The phone rang. And rang. And rang. Patton was about to just hang up when the phone was answered.

_“Patton? It’s 2 am. What are you doing calling this late?” A pause. “Are you okay? Do you need me to pick you up? Are they fighting again?!”_ Virgil’s voice was getting more frantic. He was working himself into a panic. That would not do. He couldn’t let Virgil have a panic attack because of him. It was bad enough that he was the reason his parents were fighting, he wouldn’t hurt his best friends as well.

“I’m fine, Virgil. Promise.” His voice was soft and practised. “I just- I realised I forgot to give you your present last time we met up. I thought I could give it to you now?”

There was some shuffling in the background. Probably Virgil trying to get Anastacia off of him. That dog was very clingy when she was tired. _“And that’s all? You’d tell me if something else was up, right?”_ Virgil sounded very sceptical.

“Of course, Vee.” Patton’s voice wavered. “Always. I was thinking we could meet up at the park? In about… twenty minutes?”

_“…sure. Hey, why don’t you come crash at my place? My folks won’t care. They’d love to have you over… even though it’s in the middle of the night.”_

Patton was sure Virgil knew he didn’t call just because of the gift. It didn’t matter. Virgil had invited him over, and Patton wasn’t going to let Virgil down. “Okay, Vee. Love you.”

_“Love you too, Pat. See you in twenty minutes.”_

Patton quickly found a bag and clothes and other necessities to pack. He made sure there was room for Virgil’s gift on top, it shouldn’t do if it got crinkled. He lingered a bit in his doorway. Was he really going to do this? Run away from his parents? Sure, he was 18 years now, but that still didn’t really change anything. He sighed. It was now or never, and Virgil was waiting for him.

He opened his door very carefully. It sometimes creaked when it was opened, but you could never know when it would, as it wasn’t all the time. Luckily, it didn’t this time, and Patton slowly stepped into the hallway. They lived in a two-story building. His room was upstairs, so he had to be extra careful when walking downstairs since the wooded floor creaked oh-so loudly all the time.

He tippytoed downstairs, making sure to avoid all the placed the floor creaked the loudest. Finally, he was at the door. He pulled his warmest outdoor clothes on before carefully unlocking the door and heading out. Then he started walking. Walking and walking and walking. It felt like he was walking for an eternity.

He looked at his clock. It was 2:34 am. Oh no, he was late! He hoped that Virgil would stay and not think Patton was just pulling his leg. He started running. The cold was beginning to get to him. It hurt. Please be there still, Virgil!

Finally, Patton arrived at the park. It was now 2:43 am. He looked around. And sighed. Virgil wasn’t there. Of course, he wasn’t there. Patton was late. Why should he wait around for Patton when he couldn’t be there on time? He sat down at the nearest bench. And cried. The dam was broken. He cried and cried and cried. Cried more than he ever had in years. Why couldn’t he just be what his parents wanted him to be? Why did he have to be so goddamn broken?!

He didn’t know how long he sat there, but it felt like forever. And just as he was about to just go back, a warm hand was gently placed on his knee. And then a gently and all too familiar voice spoke. “Oh Patty, what did they do to you? I’m here.” It was Virgil. And at that, Patton broke completely and flung himself at Virgil, not even bothering looking up, because he knew Virgil would catch him.

“I’m sorry! I’m s-so sorry! I- I didn’t know what else to do or where to go! I don’t wanna be there anymore!” Patton sobbed. He sobbed his heart out in Virgil’s chest. Let Virgil know that he couldn’t keep up the façade.

“Hey, shh, it’s alright. I’m here, Pat. I’m here,” Virgil soothed, running a gentle hand up and down Patton’s back. “I thought this was more than just a present, so I let Pa and Dad know you’re coming home. It’s okay.”

Patton was so relieved that Virgil was as smart as he was. He let himself be lead into Virgil’s car, the warmth flooding him. It was so nice.

They drove in silence, Patton falling asleep halfway home to Virgil. How did he get so lucky and get such a wonderful best friend?

He was gently woken up by Virgil after they arrived. “We’re here, Pat. Let’s get you inside. It’s pretty cold out, and you look like you haven’t eaten or drank anything for a while.” Patton didn’t reply, just let Virgil guide him once more. “There we go. Into the warmth.”

Patton opened his eyes blearily when he was met with the familiar scent of Virgil’s home. Virgil still had his arms around him, so he snuggled closer. He really didn’t want Virgil to let go of him just yet. “Mmm, you’re s’ warm,” Patton mumbled. That earned a small, almost nonexistent laugh out of Virgil.

“Yeah, but let’s get you out of that clothes and into the blankets on the couch, okay?” Virgil smiled at him.

“M’kay. If you insist. B’ can we sn’ggle after?” Patton shifted a bit as Virgil helped him out of his jacket and shoes.

Virgil breathed a small laugh. “Of course!”

After they’d finally settled on the couch, two pairs of footsteps could be heard. Patton was too tired to even look at who it was.

“Hey, hon. How you feelin’?” Remy. One of Virgil’s dads. He was answered with silence. He was too tired. “That tired, huh? Well, it won’t do that you sleep on the couch. Virgil can take you to his room for you two to continue snuggling.” And just like that, someone picked him up. Patton let out a tiny yelp, but other than that, he gave no reaction.

Next thing he knew, he was layn in a warm and soft bed with Virgil snuggling close to him again. And they fell asleep like that.

Next morning, Patton woke up to someone carding their fingers gently through his hair. And Patton was so content with that. If he were a cat, he would’ve started purring loudly. Instead, his stomach grumbled. Very loudly. The carding fingers stopped.

“Morning, Pat. Sleep well?” Virgil whispered. Virgil. Virgil was the one carding his fingers through his hair. Please don’t stop! As though sensing his thoughts, Virgil started again. Oh, Patton was so content. And to answer his question, Patton snuggled closer to Virgil. That got a small laugh out of him. “Come on, sleepyhead. Dad made breakfast. And from the way, your stomach just growled, you need food real bad, and pronto.”

Patton sighed. He knew Virgil was going to bring it up from last night. Well, this morning, really. “What time’s ‘t?” he asked sleepily.

“It’s almost 11 o’clock. So I guess it’s technically brunch Dad made.” Virgil huffs out a laugh. “Neither of us wanted to wake you up after last night. Did you even sleep at all before calling me?”

Patton sheepishly shook his head. He hadn’t even realised he’d called that late. He must’ve been so caught up in his thoughts that hours seemed like seconds. Virgil hugged him tighter. “I’m so sorry, Patton. Sorry I couldn’t have been there for you sooner. But you’re here now, and I’m not letting you go back there!” Virgil said fiercely. Oh, how Patton loved Virgil. Always there for him. How could he have doubted him for even a second? Patton was such a lousy friend for doing that.

“Thanks, Vee. You have no idea how much this means to me. But I can’t stay. You know that. They are paying for my college degree. They’ll pull the money if I leave for good,” Patton sighed.

“Excuse me, but I couldn’t help but overhear,” came a voice from the doorway. “But if they do that, we’ll be more than happy to pay. It’s no problem, Patton.”

“Hey, Dad.” Oh. It was Emile. “Is Logan up?” A pause. “Good, I think he might be able to help us with Patton,” Virgil responded to the most likely nod he got from Emile.

They got out of bed and went downstairs a few minutes later. Patton’s growling stomach got too much for him to handle. And downstairs sat Virgil’s parents, Remy and Emile, and Virgil’s older brother, Logan. At the table was so much food, Patton didn’t know what to think.

“Merry Christmas, Patton. Welcome to the family,” Virgil said gently, never once letting go of his hand. They sat down and started to eat.

“Wow, slow down there, babes. You’re gonna get a stomachache if you don’t,” Remy warned as Patton basically swallowed the food. “When was the last time you ate, hon?”

Patton swallowed. He really didn’t want to answer that. But he had to. He could feel Virgil’s hand in his give a comforting squeeze. He could feel Logan’s gaze on him. “I- I don’t remember. Maybe dinner, the day before yesterday?” The room got quiet.

“You didn’t eat at all yesterday?” Emile then quietly asked. Patton shook his head.

“Patton. If your parents were starving you, why didn’t you call for us? You know this isn’t healthy,” Logan gently joined the conversation. He was a med student, so Patton usually always listened to him.

Patton shrugged and poked to some eggs with his fork. “Dunno.”

“Hey, it’s okay, Patton. You’re here now. I’m not letting you go back to them. Ever!” Virgil squeezed Patton’s hand and gave him a comforting smile. Patton smiled back and mouthed ‘thanks’.

Bruch lasted for another twenty minutes, all of them quietly talking about anything and everything, but avoiding the topic of Patton’s home, for which he was grateful.

Around noon, everyone was snuggled up in the living room laughing and munching cookies and drinking hot chocolate. The family exchanged gifts, Patton watching in joy. He always loved watching people give presents to others. They got such a child-like and giddy look on their faces. That made Patton sad again. His parents never once appreciated anything he made for them. He never got to see that look on their faces, either. And they hadn’t called or texted. They’d given no sign that they knew Patton wasn’t home, given no indication that they knew he was missing.

Virgil noticed, of course. He was very observant of other people. He gently squeezed the hand he still hadn’t let go of since they woke up. “Hey, got you a gift, ya know. Let me just get it,” Virgil whispered in Patton’s hair. He kissed it before letting go of Patton’s hand to retrieve it from his room.

He wasn’t gone long, but to Patton, it felt like forever. Emile, in the meantime, had come and taken Virgil’s place and had started carding his fingers through Patton’s hair now.

Patton heard a shuffling noise from the kitchen and turned around a smidge. There stood Virgil, a rather large, and soft-looking, present in his hand. “Logan- Logan helped me with this, so if you hate it, blame it on him.” Logan gave a small huff and mumbled something along the lines of “he won’t hate it, and if he does, you drew the sketch” and Patton had no idea what they were talking about.

“Huh? I’m positive I won’t hate it! You made it, after all, Vee,” Patton smiled at him, a sincere one. Virgil gave him a smile in return and shuffled over to the couch to give it to Patton.

“Move, Dad. Patton’s mine!” Virgil chuckled as he gave the present to Patton.

Patton carefully opened it. It was rare for him to get presents, so he savoured the feeling of unwrapping it. And what Patton unwrapped had him in awe and tears. He slowly took out the fabric inside the plastic wrap and held it up. It was a cat hoodie! With a pouch, it seemed! This was beautiful!

“I- uh- I made it myself. With Logan’s help. Do you- do you like it?” Virgil asked, getting very insecure and self-conscious. That would not do! This was a wonderful present! The best he’d ever gotten!

“Like it? Virgil, I LOVE IT!” Patton basically cooed, while hugging the hoodie close to him. “You made this?! It’s incredible! It’s the best gift I’ve ever gotten,” Patton quietly added. And Virgil beamed. How could Patton resist? He flung himself into a bone-crushing hug at Virgil. “Thank you SO much, Vee,” he mumbled into Virgil’s shoulder.

“I’m thrilled you like it, Pat. But maybe check inside the pouch?” Virgil laughed, a tear falling from his eye at indirectly learning that this might be the first time Patton’s gotten a decent gift for once.

Patton immediately let go of Virgil to do as he said. He looked inside the pouch, and there was a cat plushy! Homemade, from the looks of it! Black and grey, with one purple eye and one baby-blue eye! It was adorable! And Patton loved it! He hugged it tightly and started quietly crying. “This is so nice of you, Virgil. It’s so adorable!” Patton sniffed.

“I thought about what you said, back when we first met. You know, about your favourite animals being cats but you being allergic to them? I thought this was as close I could get to actually giving you one,” Virgil said, scratching the back of his head awkwardly. Patton looked up at him with teary eyes. Oh, Virgil was never letting Patton go back to his parents.

“Thank you SO MUCH, Virgil,” Patton whispered, pouring all his emotions into those five words, before hugging Virgil again. “I’m gonna name her Shadow.”

Virgil reciprocated the hug before whispering in Patton’s ear: “You’re very welcome, Patton. Anything for you. You deserve to be happy.”

Patton, all of a sudden, reared back. Virgil was confused but started thinking he’d said something wrong. “I totally forgot all about _your_ present! Where’s my bag? I’ll be right back!” Patton exclaimed after Remy pointed in the direction of his bag, sprinting to retrieve it.

And right back Patton was. He’d been careful with handling the bag, but he was very giddy about Virgil opening it. But also very nervous. He handed it to Virgil before sitting back down next to him, barely able to contain his excitement and dread. Because, what if Virgil hated it? What if-

A hand landed softly on his shoulder. Patton looked over to look into Logan’s dark blue eyes. “Breathe with me, Patton. 4-7-8. There’s no need to be concerned. Let’s get your mind steered away from the cognitive distortions, shall we?” Logan spoke softly. Patton nodded. Logan was kind. He was good at this.

After a few breathing rounds, Patton felt much better and signalled this to Virgil. Virgil then proceeded to carefully open Patton’s gift. His eyes went comically big. “This is- I- you _made this_?!” Virgil exclaimed, at a loss for other words. He was in awe. In front of him laid a black hoodie with lots of purple plaid patches scattered around. The cuffs had zippers sewn into them so, they were easier to put on.

“Yeah. I know how you loved that other hoodie. You were so sad when it got ruined for good by those bullies. I thought I’d make you a new one, but one that matches you better than the black and grey one. Looks like we had the same gifts ideas,” Patton chuckled. “Do you like it?”

“Yes, Patton! I love it!” Now it was Virgil’s turn to tackle hug Patton. “And you _made it yourself!_ This must have taken forever!”

Patton returned the hug in full. Tears of happiness that Virgil liked his gift rolled down his cheeks. “It did. I had to work a lot to save up the money I needed to get the fabrics and make sure mom and dad didn’t find any of them. But it was worth it! Don’t even start with saying it’s not worth me saving up my money, mister! Because you are!”

The two best friends stayed that way for a long time before separating to put on their new hoodies. They cuddled up on the couch after that, Patton in between Virgil and Logan. He was very content. He would never give this up for anything!

They talked for what seemed like hours before settling on watching movies. All was peaceful and tranquil. Patton hoped it would never end.

But of course, all good times must come to an end. Patton's phone chimed. The only other people who would call him was in the room with Patton. So it could only mean that it was his parents calling. The air got eerie quiet. Nobody moved a muscle. In the end, Emile picked it up. “Hello?”

_“PATTON! WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?! GET BACK HERE, RIGHT NOW!!”_ someone shouted on the other end. Emile winched.

“I’m afraid this is Emile Picani you’re speaking with. Not. Patton.” Emile’s voice had a forced cheeriness to it. “How may I help you?”

Shuffling. _“Where is our son, Picani?”_ a female voice said. Patton could clearly hear the ice in her voice and see the scowl on her face. His mother was not a very nice person.

“He’s staying with us. He called Virgil during the night and wanted to exchange gifts. Time got out of hand.”

_“Well. Isn’t that just great? Thank you for finding him, but please tell him to come home immediately.”_ Her voice was devoid of any kind of emotions now. The only thing you could detect was the ice.

“I’m afraid Patton told us he didn’t want to. And since he’s 18, he’s legally an adult and can, therefore, make such decisions on his own. Contact the police, and they will tell you the same. And I will inform them that you have been starving him. Is. That. Clear?” No one in the household had ever heard such a tone of voice come out of Emile Picani’s mouth.

The line on the other end went quiet. _“Fine. Keep the brat. He’s no good anyway. We’re cutting off his college fonds. See how well you like him now.”_ The line cut off. The house was silent.

“What a pleasant woman. Well. It’s settled. You’re staying with us, Patton. For good,” Emile smiled. Patton hugged Emile close when he came over. “They should never have been allowed to become parents if they didn’t even have decent humanity encoded in their bones. I can’t even tell they are your parents, Patton. You are one of the most amazing human beings on this planet! Never change.” Emile kissed Patton’s hair before releasing him from the hug and going back to snuggle with Remy “And don’t worry about college. We’ll pay. It’s no problem.” Patton went back to receiving cuddles from Virgil and Logan. They were his new family. And they would never leave. Never harm him on purpose. Never force him to be anything he wasn’t.

Patton usually dreaded Christmas. But from this Christmas and forward, he might come to look forward to it. “Thank you, Virgil,” Patton whispered before dozing off. They’d need to return to get his things, but for now, he would cuddle.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey there. So, how'd you like that? It got a bit out of hand at the end... heh.
> 
> And yeah, before the dialogue began, that was all my experiences with my parents. The fighting was exaggerated, and I didn't have anyone to turn to for help, or telling me to get away. I'm still here. Not gonna move away before University. Still about a year and a half for that. I also don't have the economy to move away just yet. Also, haven't really told anyone about this... Let's just say I wasn't exactly looking forward to Christmas this year... or ever. 
> 
> Also, someone PLEASE!!! Draw that cat plushie!! Because I can't for the life of me do it!! You get to experiment with how it looks, it just has to be black and grey with one purple and one baby-blue eye!! It has to be roughly the size of a young-adult cat and be cute as heck!!
> 
> Please leave a kudos and comment if you want to.


End file.
